I Know You, Who Are You Now?
by LesboDyke
Summary: It's over. I'm dead. Those are the first thoughts to cross your mind as you see the curse break around you. [[Future!SwanQueen. Serious Angst! Femmeslash!]]
1. Chapter 1

It's over. I'm dead.

Those are the first thoughts to cross your mind as you see the curse break around you, watch everyone get their memory back just because the saviour kissed your sons head.  
True love.  
There's a pain in your chest and someone's telling you to run, you don't know who. You only know one thing.  
They're going to kill you. And you've lost Henry.  
And you're honestly not sure which of the two of those scares you more.

You stumble forward slowly, forcing your legs to work as you cup Henry's face.  
"I love you. Don't let anyone tell you different." You say, your voice managing not to break. Henry just nods, he doesn't say it back and that hurts too.

Then you take the advice given to you. You do run. You've never ran from anything before, not really. But here you are, the once great Queen running through the back streets of what was your town to get back to your home and safe. For now at least.

You lock and bolt both the front and back doors before slowly, your legs hurt now, making your way up the stairs and collapsing on Henry's bed.  
You reach under his bed, your fingers grasping his memory box as you go through it slowly.

The day you got him, so sweet. He had his eyes open as Gold put him in your arms. He had been crying, until your arms encircled him and he was instantly silent, blinking up at you trustingly.  
His first steps, you'd cried tears of pride as he wobbled his way towards you unsteadily. He'd laughed as you smothered his face in kisses before kissing you back.  
His first word, '_Mommy_'. You'd cried again but he just kept repeating it over and over, so proud of his new ability.  
First day of school, school dances, trips to the lake, days together, face painting, baking, building the treehouse in the back garden.  
All of these things were chronicled here, all his love was in this box.  
There was none of it left in him. Not for you at least. He saw you the same way everyone else did now.  
Evil.

Were you evil? You pondered this as you carefully re-packed the box, taking some of his note-paper to scribble something, in case he comes back.  
You doubt he will, doubt he'd want to, but you need to make sure.

Your tears, when had you started crying?, marked the page as you wrote slowly and deliberately.  
You needed to be clear.

You rested the note atop the box, which sat on his bed along with his teddy bear. You stood then, casting a glance round his room and choking back a sob before leaving, making sure the door was slightly ajar. Henry hated having his door shut, you remembered that. He'd cry for you if you shut his door, especially at night. Not anymore though.  
You still left the door ajar.

You made your way to your room next. So cold, compared to Henry's. So empty. The only personal thing was the photo next to your bed.  
It was a halloween picture, you'd dressed as Morticia Adamms and Henry, at his own insistance, dressed as you. When you'd asked him why, he said '_Everyone in this town is kinda afraid of you. So this'll be the best costume ever!_' and you'd laughed. He'd hugged you, his arms round your waist and his face blinking up at you as he told you '_I'm not afraid of you though. I love you Mom._'  
Fresh tears were spilling now as you stood, just staring at the picture. You looked so happy, you noted, your head resting atop Henry's wig, the two of you laughing as he tried to hide your face with a lollipop, which was simply hitting your nose.

You force yourself to turn away, gathering things slowly. You know what happens when you cross the town line. That was your plan, before anyone came for you. You'd leave.

As you pack, the skin on the back of your arm raises and your heart tugs at you. The magic is back.

A voice in your head is demanding you stay, take Henry by force! He was yours rightfully, but you told that voice no. You weren't that person any more.  
It was time to go.

You cast one last glance to the picture, wanting to bring it with you. You know you can't though. Anything like that would compromise you. Make you want to come back. No, no you had to leave now.  
You write yourself a letter to before sneaking out the back door, worrying your lip between your teeth as you clamber into your car and whiz off down the road.  
You manage to make it to the town line and you pause, the engine idling as you think through the decision the final time. With a heavy heart, you press down on the gas pedal and propel yourself forward.

What in the hell...?  
You blink slowly and frown, what were you doing here? There's a note on the seat next to you, that should be the first clue.  
Slowly, you open it, unfolding it and raising an eyebrow as you recognise your own handwriting, only rushed slightly. And the paper was kinda wet.

'_Regina._  
_You can't stay in Storybrooke anymore. I know you're confused, trust me things won't get any clearer, but you need to leave._  
_Go to New York or Los Angeles. Somewhere big, where no-one will find you._  
_Start. Again._  
_Regina_'

That was it. No explanation. You let out a groan of frustration before deciding, if you'd written the letter, which it was pretty obvious you had, you should listen to it. So down your foot goes and you take off.


	2. Chapter 2

Three months had passed since you'd left Storybrooke and still you didn't know why you'd done it.  
But you were settled now, here in New York. And oddly, it was nice to be anonymous. This was the fresh start you'd wanted. No-one knew you here and no-one cared.

You had a nice routine going, you'd rise at six thirty, shower, dress, go down to the coffee shop and buy a Caramel Latte and a muffin, ride the bus to your job as a Nursery School Teacher, get covered in paint and other substances, ride the bus home, cook dinner, watch TV and sleep.  
You liked the fact that although nothing seemed to change, everything changed.  
There were never the same faces on the bus, there was always new things to do with the children, there were different people in the coffee shop, you'd pass different people on the street.  
It was heaven.

Until it happened.

You had no idea it was coming, but it was.  
You were heading back from work, glitter in your hair and paint on your face. You probably looked more than a little insane, but you didn't really care all that much. You had a cookie in one hand, something one of your kids had baked at home for you, and a smoothie in the other, had to stay healthy.  
You noticed her just a second too late, just as she was about to hit you. You just managed to avoid spilling your drink on her or yourself, but still the impact hurt.

"Oh my god I'm so sorry, are you alright?" You asked instantly as she looked up at you. And she froze, her eyes wide, her jaw hitting the floor. You can't help but raise an eyebrow.  
"Are you alright?" You repeat, eyeing her suspiciously. When she doesn't answer again and just keeps staring at you, you slowly sidestep your way around her and hurriedly begin walking again.

"Wait!" Her voice calls after you. '_No thanks_' you think and speed your steps up slightly, almost hitting a jog. You can hear her following you and your heart begins to thud in panic.  
"Regina! Wait!" She calls and then you freeze. How did she know your name?  
She nearly slams into you again, but dodges to the side quickly and comes to a halt face to face with you.  
"Regina?" She repeats, staring at you in awe once again. You suck your lip into your mouth and worry it between your teeth before answering.

"Do I know you?" Her face furrows into a frown and she tucks a lock of blonde hair behind her ear.

"It's me... Emma?" She says, frowning deeper when you give no response.  
"What's wrong with you?" She asks after a moment, her hand twitching before she stills it.

"I'm sorry, I think you've got the wrong person..." You say politely, trying to dodge past her again, but she's quicker than you and she blocks your path.

"No I haven't." She says simply, still examining you before, almost as she wasn't controlling it, the woman's arm rose and plucked a little glitter out of your hair. You flinch back straight away, but she doesn't apologise, seemingly fixated with the glitter now.  
"What are you doing here?" She asks quietly, sounding... broken almost. It sets something off in the back of your head. You're not sure what entirely, but you know you can't just let this go. '_Goddamnit!_' you curse internally before sighing and speaking up again.

"Listen, would you like to come upstairs for coffee? Get this... whatever it is... straightened out?" Her head snaps up and she meets your eye again before nodding slowly.

"Thanks..." She mumbles, rubbing her fingers together to get rid of the glitter. You nod and once again start walking, but she doesn't block you off this time. Instead she walks about half a step behind you, and you can tell she's staring at you.

This was going to be an interesting chat.


End file.
